When I go on a trip, I have high expectations that I will discover my life purpose and have some earth-shattering awakening or maybe even meet the man of my dreams. While none of these things happened on my most recent vacation, I learned so many lessons over the two weeks in Scandinavia and was able to observe some important things about myself and how I live my life.
The Virgo Planner
Leading up to my trip, I spent many evenings researching the countries I would visit. There were the more traditional sites like TripAdvisor, Lonely Planet and official city visitor pages. Then I found myself down the never-ending tunnel of travel blogs, YouTube videos and Facebook groups. I discovered that some people are more interested in shoving their faces in front of the camera to become celebrities, rather than actually show you cool places in Copenhagen. I took notes on the places that did sound interesting and pinned some of the locations on my Google Maps.
I had convinced myself that I hadn’t done a lot of planning, since I hadn’t really booked anything, other than two restaurant reservations and a pub crawl, that I later canceled after seeing there was an age limit on it (which I passed about 10 years ago).
But I still approached the trip with the mind of the Virgo planner that I am. When I was in Copenhagen, I bought the Copenhagen Card, which included free entry to almost every museum and many attractions in the city. I suddenly felt the need to check off these attractions and was mapping out the best way to accomplish this. Only a few things threatened to get in my way – my severe jet lag and a blister from the shoes I thought would be amazingly comfortable. But a stop at the pharmacy (apotek) and ignoring my fatigue kept me going.
Wandering Away From the Tourist Attractions
Park in Copenhagen
On my last day in Copenhagen before flying to Bergen, I ended up with a lot of free time. I had to check out of the hotel at noon, my Copenhagen Card had expired and my flight was not until 10 p.m. So, I just started walking. After about six blocks, I came upon a beautiful park with hills and a lake. I sat down on the soft grass and just took in the beauty of the park. The park was not listed on any of the travel sites, but it gave me a sense of peace and was a nice place to rest from the frantic pace I had kept over the past few days. It was easy to get caught up in people watching at the park, and my belief in romance (and a touch of jealousy) was restored after seeing a cute couple gazing into each other’s eyes. Had I not wandered, I would have never known about this park or experienced this beautiful place, which gave me some insight into the locals.
Beautiful flowers in Bergen
I also experienced the gift of wandering in Bergen. While the first day was a tight schedule with a fjord tour, I expected the second day to be a waste of time. The weather forecast said there would be thunderstorms, so I wasn’t sure what I was going to do, as most of the beauty of Norway seemed to be outdoors. Well, Mother Nature decided she wasn’t listening to that forecast, and it turned into a beautiful sunny day. So, I wandered. I found a cute little coffee shop. I got a cappuccino and sat at a little table outside and started to journal. Again, I felt a sense of calm with a little spike of caffeine to send me off wandering to discover more new things. This time I found another beautiful park by the museums with amazing displays of flowers. While sitting in this park I heard a musician playing his guitar with the sound of fountains in the background. I felt the beautiful breeze blow through my hair, and toward the end of the day, the softness of small raindrops.
Street Art
In Stockholm, I continued to wander after getting frustrated trying to find my way to a museum that seemed impossible to reach through a construction zone. I gave up on the museum and while walking down a random street, I found a large display of street art on a building, which was free to see, and then stumbled upon a hilly park with a beautiful church in Södermalm.
Wandering Through the Single Life
Wandering isn’t just for vacation. I think we can find the value of wandering in our own lives, especially when what we think we want isn’t really working out. For example, I always thought the path for me was to get married and have kids. Rather than stay in the frustration of that not working out and continuing to push to make it happen, I can wander and appreciate all the things that have happened in my life because I am wandering. Had I taken that other path that so many have taken before me, I would probably not be a super aunt, a mentor, start a blog or podcast or even travel. I have found these activities while wandering, and they have given me tremendous joy. In some ways these things found me when I was unsure of the direction of my life.
Wandering doesn’t have to result in something spectacular. I mean, you might find something you don’t like at all. That is the mystery and magic of wandering. You have to let go of expectations. I know – if you are like me – that sounds scary. If you are a planner and a goal-driven person, wandering can seem like a waste of time. Instead, I think it helps you to get unstuck and unattached to the results of everything you do. It can also open your mind to more creativity and find new direction for your life.
10 Ideas for Wandering in Everyday Life
Here are 10 small ways you can try wandering in your regular life to build up the courage to let go more often:
Pick a random book and read it
Try a new recipe
Talk to someone you don’t know at a networking event or attend a meetup
Drive a different way to work and take notice of the new surroundings (safely, of course).
Pick a weekend day, don’t plan anything and just do whatever feels good from moment to moment with no expectations for yourself
Listen to a podcast that has nothing to do with your interests or profession
Walk around a park (unless you live in Arizona, you may need to wait a month or two)
Try on clothes that are not your typical style
Go to the grocery store or florist and stop and smell the flowers
Pick a random person from your contacts and actually give them a call (not a text)
Please share your ideas for wandering and your experiences from wandering in the comments below.
While it can be difficult for a planner like me to just go with the flow and wander, when I take the time to reflect, I can see all the gifts I have received from wandering. Sometimes wandering without expectations brings meaning and new, unexpected joy to your life.